Notre Dame Sees a Decrease in COVID-19 and an Increase in Bee Attacks

Author: Krienke, Kimani

Notre Dame Sees a Decrease in COVID-19 and an Increase in Bee Attacks

When gearing up to return back to campus, many students were concerned about their chances of contracting COVID-19, on top of many other perilous threats. In the scramble, we never saw the bees coming. By this point in the semester, positive COVID-19 cases are on average not rising by more than six cases each day within the campus community. Bee attacks, on the other hand, are doubling and tripling each day. Students have never wished for the dreaded South Bend winter like they have this semester.

On top of asking students to wear a mask, wash their hands and complete their daily health checks, the university is also encouraging students to spend more time outside when gathering in large groups. But that’s just what the bees want, isn’t it? I witnessed two bees fight over a maple syrup container in a way that wouldn’t be up to code for either Bengal Bouts or Baraka Bouts. Last week, I was pouring dressing on a southwest salad when a bee flew right into the stream, ending its own life and my appetite for the salad. I even heard about a bee that flew into a girl’s mouth a few weeks ago.

It’s hard to stand with the Save the Bees initiative when I can’t eat one (1) meal in peace outside without a swarm of curious bees attacking me. One of my friends has 16 confirmed kills and counting. Some people may view keeping an ongoing tally of bees killed as inhumane, but that’s 16 fewer potential attacks and ruined salads in my eyes.

After being relentlessly bothered by bees while eating, junior Georgia White did some research. “I looked up why the bees are so obsessed with me,” she said. “Apparently it’s because I look like a flower.” So maybe that bee isn’t trying to ruin your meal and instead wants to go on a dining hall date with you. Some students that don’t resemble flowers, whatever that means, are feeling left out by the new discovery. “Not even the bees want me,” said junior Taylor Black. Ouch, I know we all felt that one. Isolation brought on by the pandemic has made us all lonely and desperate; I’m seriously considering taking up the next bee that “attacks” me on its dining hall date offer before it dies in a few weeks. At least I don’t have to worry about getting COVID-19 from it.