I Want to Be President

Author: Chris Russo

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You have just arrived on campus. Your major, undecided, but you’re leaning toward political science. Why? Well, why not? You were class president … four years in a row. Grandpa always said, out of all the cousins, YOU were going to be President. It’s like in The Godfather. Don Corleone tells Michael, “You would be the one to hold the strings… Senator Corleone… Governor Corleone.” Still not sold? Let’s turn to a real time conversation between two first-years — a political science major and an unsuspecting stranger, presumably accounting. 


Poli Sci Guy (PSG): Hi my name is _____. I’m from Chicago, more or less. I live in Baumer Hall, and I’m studying political science! 

Practical Accounting Major (PAM): Great! My name is _____. I’m from New Jersey, but let’s just say outside ‘The City.’ I live in Dunne, and I’m accounting. 

PSG: An aspiring Big Four guy I assume!

PAM: Yep, guilty. Butttt what does one do with a political science degree? 

PSG: *wearing the “Study Anything Do Everything” shirt from the Arts & Letters welcome table* Well, what can’t you do?! Plenty of people consult, go to law school, teach, you name it. As for me, I want to be president. 

PAM: … of what? 

PSG: Um, the country. 

PAM: … the United States? 

PSG: Of America. 

PAM: Ahhh I see. The White House. 

PSG: That’s the one … one and only really. 

PAM: How do you apply? I have a feeling the Career Center won’t help. 

PSG: You don’t really apply. It’s more like an audition. 

PAM: And you think you’re qualified? 

PSG: Yep.

PAM: More than anybody else? 

PSG: I mean — you’ve seen my competition. 

PAM: When you say president, you mean the commander in chief. Top Dog. In charge of everything? 

PSG: That’s the one. 

PAM: And you know that, now, at 18, you would do this job well? Better than anyone else. 

PSG: *without wincing* I mean — I watched The West Wing. 

PAM: What are you going to do if you don’t become president? 

PSG: Podcasting.