Humor

Jaykins Changes Contraceptives Policy...Again
Christ Enters the Bengal Bouts Ring
North Dining Hall Bans Eggs

North Dining Hall Bans Eggs

Author: Maddie Loftin

In order to restore balance to the universe following the reinstatement of Grab and Go, North Dining Hall has announced that they will no longer tolerate any eggs on their premises.

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Students Wait for Fighting Ireland Delegation to Arrive at the Olympics
Women’s Basketball Beats Men’s Team by 200 Points
Duncan Student Center Breakdown
Students Call for More Homework at March for Strife
Chandler Sorin Haunts the Stepan Center
Fr. Jaykins to Star in New Live-Action Remake of

Fr. Jaykins to Star in New Live-Action Remake of "A Goofy Movie"

Author: Becca Fritz

Disney recently released a trailer for its latest live-action movie remake; this time, the entertainment company is remaking “A Goofy Movie.” The sure-to-be blockbuster will star none other than Rev. JayJay I. Jaykins, C.S.C. as the main character, Max. Fr. Jaykins scored the role with no previous acting experience after a generous donation of 60% of the University of Notre Dame’s endowment.…

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Administration Reveals Plans for Useless Spending Lab
ND Student Manages to Avoid Being Condescending to Public University Student Through a Whole Conversation
New Study Reveals Football is a Sport
DeBart Water Gains New Seasonal Flavor
North Dining Hall Renovations Still Somehow Creating Stir
Student Uses 14 Meal Swipes at Once
Father Jenkins Announces Plans for On-Campus Retirement Community
 Nearly Half of Notre Dame Squirrels Blinded by Solar Eclipse
Complete Opening of Campus Crossroads Postponed until 2078
I Looked at the Eclipse and as Penance I Have to Read Everybody's Study Abroad Blogs
Notre Dame senior enlightens classmates on what “real world” is really like
Students flock to quad on first warm day of spring, show how many balls they can throw
‘JESUS H. CHRIST’ Signature Appears on Disinvite Vice President Pencil Petition
Jaykins: I invited Pencil. Are you HAPPY NOW?
Dunne freshman learns he has high cholesterol after Keenan Revue encourages him to get checked
VIEWPOINT: Homeless people make me sad! :(
The Smirish Smover's guide to free speech
Three people who would win Notre Dame Hunger Games
Pete Bootijudge concerned Notre Dame students a little too obsessed with him
'Jesus H. Christ' signature appears in uninvite Vice President Pencil petition